Whereas traditional emotional diplomacy advocates for an official state-ordained diplomacy policy, there are times when in interpersonal relations emotions may be the key to moving things forward or reigniting talks following a breakdown in negotiations.

In 1993, during the Bush administration, talks between Israel and Jordan were initiated in Washington D.C. Palestinians were included as members in the Jordanian delegation, but due to the ongoing conflict between the Palestinians and Israelis this was not acceptable to either party.

The situation reached an impasse, and the interim solution was that the heads of the delegations would hold talks in the hotel lobby, as in “couch diplomacy.” As the talks dragged on (between the heads of the delegations) downstairs, the remaining delegates waited upstairs for some sign of progress.

Meanwhile, the members of both delegations regularly crossed paths in the hotel lobby, filling their coffee cups and studiously avoiding each other. One day, Israeli representative Zalman Shoval went down to the lobby as usual, poured himself a cup of coffee, and took a sip. The experience was apparently so awful that he lost his composure and blurted out to the person standing near him—Dr. Salam al-Majali, the head of the Jordanian delegation exclaimed “Wouldn’t you agree that this coffee is awful?” and Dr. al-Majali agreed wholeheartedly: “It’s terrible!”

Suddenly they were on the same emotional wavelength; the two participants were in “complete accord about the superiority of the Middle Eastern version of the drink.” This action broke the ice that had stymied the proceedings,resulting in the hosts exiting the lobby and both delegations sitting down in a proper meeting room to begin negotiations (Keys, 2019). This leads one to deduce that interpersonal emotions are not entirely out of place in the diplomatic process.

Diplomacy: Unexpected opportunities may be the key to breaking the impasse!

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